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Settled in the Unsettling

I rest in an unsettling place in the film making process where production is nearing its end, and the initial editing stages have begun. Both the bittersweet feelings of wrapping production and the distaste of seeing the story’s images for the first time tear at my every emotion. I am constantly reminded by peers and professors that this is exactly the stage I should feel stuck in. I should welcome questions such as: “Is this the film I intended to make?” “Will audiences connect with this piece?” “Will this production meet expectations?” Some days, I am quick to answer “no!” other days I repeat a resounding “yes!” The life of a director is constantly filled with this tumultuous flip-flopping and undulation of emotions. While it’s an incredibly uncomfortable purgatory, surrounding oneself with critical, encouraging, and honest friends and professionals provides justification for this tough process.  While I am able to see the value in the hard-working crew, organized set structure, and high quality filming process, the only thing audiences will be able to judge and recall is the final film itself. Such a stinging reminder both pushes me harder and scares the living daylights out of me. But for now, I shall remain settled in the unsettling.

 

The lovely Jordan and Micah capturing stunning images and audio. (Copyright Christopher Behnen)

The lovely Jordan and Micah capturing stunning images and audio. (Copyright Christopher Behnen)

Reviewing the footage (Copyright Christopher Behnen)
Reviewing the footage (Copyright Christopher Behnen)

The beautiful and talented (small portion) of the crew! (Copyright Christopher Behnen)

The beautiful and talented (small portion) of the crew! (Copyright Christopher Behnen)

 

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About amariecarey

An inspiring young film producer/director/writer who is passionate about reflecting on the many complicated facets of humanity through integrating history into modern storytelling through the medium of film.

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